It's 2am and I have finally given up on sleep. Our flight to Miami and then onto Haiti is at 5:30am, so we have to be at the airport at 3:30. Our alarm is set for 3am but I'm creeping around the house trying not to wake my husband. I feel foolishly like a little kid on Christmas morning, waiting to open presents. I feel like shouting, "It's here, it's here, I'm finally going back!" It's no secret to my friends and family that once I've decided something I am not very good about waiting for it. Patience is not my strong suit. I don't want to spend hours on planes, I just want to drive straight to King's Garden, see Dr. Morquette and dive into spending time with the kids.
Fortunately God values our journeys and our goals, not just the destinations. He uses the time to prepare our hearts and minds and bodies for what He has in store for us. A few months ago I spent time with my cousins and their toddlers. I'm remember watching them try to move so much faster than their little bodies were capable of, and that's how I feel right now. I'm trying to quiet myself, to listen to the whispers rather than the shouts, to simple trust. I stumbled across a photo of the child I wrote about in my blog entry last year. I'm looking forward to seeing him and wondering if he still clamors to be held or if this year he'll be running around with the older ones. Until that moment of reunion, I'll continue surrendering the excitement, allowing space for the work I know God is still doing in my heart, work that won't stop when I arrive but will continue after we leave. Now, it's 2:30am...inching closer to departure!